If you know me outside of class, you probably know that I'm a not-so-closet math and science geek. But I think I can make the graph above make sense to everyone, even you haven't calculated sine curves in a while. :-)
I'm kidding. Actually it's very simple. This graph represents a natural evolution of a student's motivation. Every child that joins martial arts is excited, that's why they started. However, it is completely natural that eventually something causes that excitement to wane. It could be something negative that happens in class, it could be actual boredom. But more often it's wanting to stay home to keep playing their video games, watching tv, or playing with their friends. Often even the idea in the back of the child's mind that they MIGHT get to do those things is enough to hear:
"I don't wanna go to class".
This is naturally very concerning to a parent that had such high hopes, and is paying for the classes. Usually this will happen once or twice and the conversation will go something along the lines of:
Parent: "Why don't you want to go to class?" (genuinely trying to diagnose the problem)
Kid: "It's boring"
Parent: "How can it be boring, you loved it last time you were there?"
Kid: "It's boring" (possibly while they're staring intently a their Nintendo 3DS XL)
Parent: "Well you have to go."
Kid: "I DON'T WANNA GO".
Parent: (now concerned) "Ok, let's take a break today, but then you HAVE TO go on Saturday".
Kid: "Ok"
Then Saturday rolls around and the same conversation ensues. By the third or fourth time, it ends with:
Parent: "I'm not going to keep paying for classes if you're not going to go!"
Kid: "OK" (maybe watching videos of some guy playing a Mario game on YouTube through their Wii, possibly while also playing their Nintendo 3DS XL)
This is often decision day. And often times the decision is to quit. Before I diagnose this a little, 1 piece of advice:
If you find a way, with your instructors help, to motivate your child to continue, they WILL thank you when they earn their Black Belt. I guarantee. I meet adults every day that say: "Man, I wish I would have stuck with it!" I have never heard anyone say: "Man, I am SO GLAD I quit when I was a kid!"
When you find yourself in this situation, the first thing to understand is that every single student, and parent, goes through it. When I poll our highest ranking Black Belts, they all say they have gone through it many times. Remember, when their motivation is low, if you can help them through it, it will go up again.
Keep in mind that loss of motivation could be due to something that happened in class. Or it could be due to getting demoralized due to a loss at a tournament. But if the answer isn't clear, it's equally likely to be tv or video games. Don't let your child quit something healthy so they can play even more video games. This goes for any activity you choose, martial arts or not.
So, what can you do? The first thing is talk to the child. Put yourself into their mind and try to find out if something actually happened, if they really dislike martial arts, or if it's tv and video games. Then speak to your instructor. They have years of experience teaching hundreds or thousands of kids. They've seen it before and will have solutions for you. Maybe trying a weapons class would be re-motivating. Maybe a special event or a new piece of equipment. Maybe helping out in a class would be re-motivating. There's lots of solutions. And if your child loved martial arts, we can get them back to that again.... with your help.
Thanks for reading!
-Ryan Johnson
www.JohnsonsATA.com
Johnson's ATA on Facebook
JohnsonsATA1 on Twitter
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